#FUNNY QUOTES ABOUT LIFE FULL#
#FUNNY QUOTES ABOUT LIFE FREE#

“I’ve been imitated so well I’ve heard people copy my mistakes.” “There are two kinds of artists left: those who endorse Pepsi and those who simply won’t.” The public doesn’t give a damn what goes on in between.” “There are two golden rules for an orchestra: start together and finish together. “I don’t know anything about music, In my line you don’t have to.” “If I didn’t do this well, I just wouldn’t have anything to do…I can’t cook, and I’d be a terrible housewife.” “To achieve great things, two things are needed: a plan and not quite enough time.” “Do it again on the next verse, and people think you meant it.” “My music is best understood by children and animals.” “All the good music has already been written by people with wigs and stuff.” In fact, we’ve made 12 albums that sound exactly the same.” “I’m sick to death of people saying we’ve made 11 albums that sound exactly the same. I ain’t never heard a horse sing a song.”

#FUNNY QUOTES ABOUT LIFE FREE#

Feel free to add some more in the comment section below too…I’m always hunting for new ones. Since there aren’t many good sources to find all of these gems in one convenient place, I’ve decided to compile 40 of my favorites in this post. If you want to spoil your dog, check out our line of species appropriate dog treats - we only use ingredients that actually benefit your dog.As many of you know, I frequently post inspiring or funny musician quotes on our Facebook, Twitter, Tumblr and Google+ pages. “When I die my dog gets everything.” - Unknown “The more people I meet, the more I love my dog.” - Unknown “Leave me alone – I’m only speaking to dogs today.” - Unknown “Choosing a dog may be the only chance you get to pick a relative.” - Unknown “If our dog doesn’t like you, we probably won’t either.” - Unknown “I don’t who care who dies in the movie, as long as the dog lives.” - Unknown “The only person who understands me is my dog.” - Unknown 'What I like most about people is their dogs.' - Unknown “Life without a dog is like an unsharpened pencil. “Beware! Dog can’t hold its licker.” - Unknown “This home is filled with love and dog hair.” - Unknown “Every snack you make, every meal you bake, every bite you take…I’ll be watching you.” - Unknown “If you want the best seat in the house, you’ll have to move the dog.” - Unknown “Nothing in the world is friendlier than a wet dog.” - Unknown

#FUNNY QUOTES ABOUT LIFE FULL#

“Without my dog my wallet would be full my house would be clean but my heart would be empty.” - Unknown “Whoever said you can’t buy happiness forgot about puppies.” - Unknown

“The best therapist has fur and four legs.” - Unknown “No home decor is complete without dog hair.” - Unknown “If your dog is fat, you aren’t getting enough exercise.” - Unknown That’s almost $21.00 in dog money.” - Joe Weinstein “My dog is worried about the economy because Alpo is up to $3.00 a can. “The average dog is a nicer person than the average person.” - Andy Rooney I mean, this was like not wanting to meet my mother.” -Bonnie Schacter “I once decided not to date a guy because he wasn’t excited to meet my dog. “You can trust your dog to guard your house but never trust your dog to guard your sandwich.” - Unknown He will just make you feel so guilty that you cannot enjoy it.” - Helen Thomson “A well trained dog will make no attempt to share your lunch. “Dogs teach us a very important lesson in life: The mailman is not to be trusted” - Sian Ford “You can say any foolish thing to a dog, and the dog will give you a look that says, ‘Wow, you’re right! I never would’ve thought of that!’” - Dave Barry Inside of a dog it’s too dark to read.” - Groucho Marx “Outside of a dog, a book is a man’s best friend. “I don’t think twice about picking up my dog’s poop, but if another dog’s poop is next to it, I think, ‘Eww, dog poop!” - Jonah Goldberg “If aliens saw us walking our dogs and picking up their poop, who would they think is in charge?” - Unknown “If you are a dog and your owner suggests that you wear a sweater suggest that he wear a tail.” – Fran Lebowitz “A boy can learn a lot from a dog - obedience, loyalty, and the importance of turning around three times before lying down. “If you’re uncomfortable around my dog, I’m happy to lock you in the other room when you come over.” - Unknown “A dog desires affection more than its dinner. They inspire me to get a dog!” -Greg Curtis They must think we’re the greatest hunters on earth!” - Anne Tyler “Ever consider what our dogs must think of us? I mean, here we come back from a grocery store with the most amazing haul, chicken, pork, half a cow. If you can’t eat it or play with it, just pee on it and walk away.” - Unknown Save this post for a rainy day or print it out and stash it in your emergency box for whenever you need a good laugh. What better way to make your day than with funny dog quotes? I've rounded up some of the funniest dog quotes I could find.

Funny quotes about life